Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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