im gay
i know
yea but for you.
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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