We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
