just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
i came on her dog
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Randomize
