I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
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