I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
I need to calm my uterus...
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
Randomize
