can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
