so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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