Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
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