Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Randomize
