Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
