I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
And then my night got REAL pukey
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
