I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
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