i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Randomize
