u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
