Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
Randomize
