i'm signing you up for texting rehab
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
