Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
Randomize
