so that wasnt chicken after all
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
