I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Randomize
