Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
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