There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize