There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
