ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
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