In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
