just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
there is glitter all over my balls
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize