Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize
