he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
