I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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