you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Randomize
