I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
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