I feel like abortions should bother me more
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
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