There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Randomize
