Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize