Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Randomize