omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
