you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Randomize
