I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
Randomize
