i don't like sucking hair
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Randomize