shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
