Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
Randomize
