So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
he thought i was a dude.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Randomize