Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
