If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
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