Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Randomize
