Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Randomize
