I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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