I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Randomize
