She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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