Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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