My first STD was from a foam party
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize
